Stop being a slob and a couch potato. That's essentially the message in the invitation I received for the "Party With Oscar" at the Magnolia Ballroom on February 27th to benefit the Denver Film Society. Sure, it's written in elegant script, and I think it's meant to be funny, but here is how the invite opens:

"Please join us for dinner and a televised presentation of the 77th Annual Academy Awards."

So far, so good, right? But then this:

"It sure beats lying around at home on the couch in your slippers eating microwave popcorn and drinking a beer."

I'm vaguely offended by their assumption. I do NOT lie around on my couch in my slippers eating popcorn and drinking a beer. As anyone who knows me realizes, I prefer wine, thank you very much. Perhaps the organizers should have left the comic relief to the on screen professionals. Still, it sounds like a fun party; Sambuca Cafe will handle the catering, (what, no popcorn?) and the beer (and wine, let's assume) will flow freely from the open bar, and movie trivia contests and a silent auction will give everyone a good chance to go home with their own keepsake, albeit a non-Oscar version. They'll even roll out the red carpet, valet your car, and meet you at Harry's Bar later for the oh-so-Hollywood after-party. Tickets are $150, or $1400 for a corporate table. Call 303-595-3456 to RSVP. I'll have to really think hard about this one. My flannel jammies are pretty damn comfy.