Going Off the Political Spin Deep End

March 20 2006, 10:42 PM
We're getting closer to seeing the 2006 election season really start to heat up, and that means it's time for candidates and campaigns to start spinning the news in their favor. We already have a leader in the clubhouse for most ridiculous spin of 2006; few have attempted to spin something as wildly as the campaign of Bob Beauprez, which posted this ditty on its Web site:
Debate Results Are In: Beauprez Wins Beauprez a statesman while desperate Holtzman hurls attacks March 17, 2006 DENVER, CO - Leading Republican gubernatorial candidate Congressman Bob Beauprez emerged from the first GOP candidates debate this morning a victor, and the clear statesman in the race. "Marc, I hear you over there saying some things that, frankly, sound political. I recognize that stuff," said Beauprez. "President Ronald Reagan...said 'trust, but verify'. That's pretty good advice." Holtzman spent much of the debate hurling desperate and baseless attacks on immigration, ignoring Beauprez's proven reform record and his backing from immigration stalwart Tom Tancredo. "Marc can call names and twist facts all he wants, but it sounds a little desperate," said Beauprez spokesman John Marshall. "This morning gave voters a clear choice: Bob Beauprez, a conservative statesman with a proven record; or Marc Holtzman."
Why is that funny? Because there are no results to come in. Beauprez and his Republican opponent, Marc Holtzman, engaged in their first debate on Friday in an event sponsored by the Southeast Denver Business Partnership. If you were there you might have an opinion of which candidate performed better, but it's not like somebody was keeping score. The results are in! is a completely meaningless line, but it sure sounds good.