The Denver Omelette just doesn’t cut it any more, even with the Democratic National Convention less than two weeks away. Instead, two of the Mile High city’s top hotels are importing some good ol’ home-cookin’ courtesy of the Obama family. As the Brown Palace Hotel and Spa encourages, like a butler fresh out of clever things to say, just come and “enrich your political palate” by enjoying some of Barack Obama’s potluck turkey chili. The chili, to be served in the hotel’s Ship Tavern, is crafted from a recipe that the senator has been perfecting since college, leaving one to infer, then, that he is still adding a dash of this and a peck of that–in other words, it’s not perfect.

I understand. After all, Obama has been busy for the last year or so. As such, I’ll turn your attention to the Marriott Denver City Center, which will host an unlikely throng of 500 Dem delegates from Obama’s home state, Illinois, the U.S. Virgin Islands, and Wisconsin. “Special amenities at turndown will include Michelle Obama’s favorite Shortbread Cookies in place of mints on the pillow.” In the Marriott’s quest to uphold the DNC’s everything-is-eco-friendly-because-we-say-it-is vibe, the hotel’s Lounge will serve “sustainable wines and liquors,” including some that are reportedly “carbon neutral.” Moreover drinkers, a.k.a. “delegates,” will mosey over to a life-sized Barack Obama cutout to have their picture taken for posterity, and warm and fuzzy (versus bleary and embarrassing) Denver memories. To give the Brown’s Ship Tavern its full due, however, please note that it will be serving banana cream pie, one of Bill Clinton’s favorite desserts. We weren’t able to immediately determine whether the former prez would be staying at the Brown (rumors indicate the entire Clinton brood will be), but we do know that in 1997, the Gold Room was transformed into the Oval Office for Clinton’s meetings with world leaders attending the Summit of the Eight. We’ve also heard he can’t resist pie. And thankfully, at least for some, no Republicans were harmed in either of the hotel’s over-hyped DNC plans. We’ll leave that to the fine lodging establishments in Minneapolis-St. Paul, host of the Republican National Convention in September.