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—Illustration by Barry Blitt

Restaurant Trends We Don’t Love

Five dining fads 5280 editors hope will flame out before next year's crop of Best New Restaurants debuts.

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Enough With The Green Stuff

We’re all for preparing superfoods in whatever way necessary to make them tasty for our ultra-fit citizenship. But after consuming kale sautéed and braised, in juice, in brownies, and in salads (so many salads!) over the past few years, we consider our duty—as far as kale is concerned—done. Will the next star veggie please stand up?

An Extra Helping Of “&”

For a new restaurant to draw attention, it needs a bold menu, sure. Apparently, it needs a flashy handle, too. Restaurateurs seem to think that means slamming an ampersand somewhere in the middle of some highfalutin words. But an & (or, even worse, a +) doesn’t mean a restaurant can subtract good food served by a vigilant staff.

Frankenfoods

The inventors of both the cronut and the ramen burger turned their hybrid foods into crazes by releasing limited supplies, which created an artificial sense of demand that led to the actual existence of demand. We’re not opposed to their smart marketing tactics or their food (both are delicious). But we do take issue with the latest manias robbing serious up-and-comers of the attention (and customers) they deserve.

Candy Is Dandy But Not In Our Liquor

A well-made cocktail greatly enhances the overall dining experience. But if you have to drown perfectly good booze in a sea of confectionery flavoring to make it palatable, might we suggest an alternative route—like, say, the dessert menu? There is dignity in Denver being a whiskey-and-beer kind of town; just try staying respectable with a s’moretini in your hand.

Million Dollar Mac ‘N’ Cheese

What happens when a greasy spoon is made of gold? You get charged for it. Restaurants around the country are serving comfort foods at uncomfortable prices, like $120 for a cheese steak in Philly, $1,000 for a sundae in New York City, and, here in the Mile High City, nearly $30 for a burger. Selling corn dogs, delicious as they may be, at caviar prices seems like price-gouging—and we’ll leave that to the airlines.

Check out our 2015 list of Denver’s Best New Restaurants

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