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"I don't support beards." —Photo Illustrations by John Ueland

Confessions of Bad Coloradans

We asked 5280 staffers and readers to (anonymously) reveal what makes each of them a #BadColoradan.

Want to be a “good” Coloradan? Visit for 5280’s ultimate list of only-in-Colorado things that every resident should do before taking their last breath of thin air.

“I don’t own a bicycle.”

“I don’t get the obsession with the Big Blue Bear.”

“Dan Marino > John Elway.”

“I once asked for a Bud at Breckenridge Brewery.”

“I prefer red chile.”

“I’m a cat person.”

“I don’t recycle my empty beer cans.”

“The Shining: overrated.”

“I’ve never climbed a fourteener.”

“I was born in Texas.”

“I’m not a fan of the state flag.”

“I prefer the beach to the mountains.”

“I’m fat.”

“My favorite brewery is in Oregon, not Colorado.”

I’ve never seen a concert at Red Rocks.

“I have never skied or snowboarded.”

“I don’t pack out my dog’s poop.”

“I use my car horn.”

“I’m a male cyclist and I don’t shave my legs.”

“I find out when my friends are planning camping trips—then schedule dentist appointments on those days.”

“I wear cotton when I work out.”

“I think Subarus are ugly. There, I said it.” Exclusive: Even more confessions from #BadColoradans:

“I don’t know how to set up a tent.”

“Seasons are overrated.”

“I think hiking is boring.”

“What’s a vaporizer?”

“I don’t own a dog.”

“I don’t think much about locally sourced stuff.”

“I despise jam bands.”

“I kind of hate beer festivals.”

“I’ve never been to Casa Bonita.”

“I haven’t toured Coors.”

“I don’t keep an ice scraper in my car. Generous people always offer to help!”

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